Who knew I’d agree so much with Alice Cooper about marriage advice?
In 1977 when I became aware of him, he repulsed me; reminding me of why it was time to let the past go. Turns out he is family in more ways than one, and offers some marriage advice worth considering, for newlyweds, and oldster-weds. (YouTube Interview)
When he and his wife, Sheryl Goddard, advised, never waste a crisis, they reminded me of the bad things – the crises – that happened in our marriage. Really bad things can happen in the best marriages.
What do we do with the pain?
On our wedding day we didn’t have a clue what effects that financial setbacks, family conflict, illnesses, parents, children and other relatives could would have on our marriage. And those effects were often good after we recovered from hitting the brick wall that came with them.
Many reproofs came after we turned our lives over to Christ. Being able to have Someone other than the other to whom we can turn has made leaning on each other easier – we aren’t each other’s only support. (Isaiah 46:3-5)
Because of this our dysfunctions, if not comprehensible, are survivable.
Some troubles left scars; others have become valuable blessons – blessings from the lessons we learned from hard times. I wish I could tattoo this on the inside of my eyelids!
A few troubles . . . I am sorry to say I was too proud to see coming, and too hard-headed to avoid. From these I learned don’t be too busy and smart to pray, especially when you know you are right. Nine times out of ten I wasn’t.
Alice Cooper and his wife described marriage in a way about which both Doug and I agree: Marriage is two dysfunctional people who refuse to give up on each other.
Is that perfect or what?
Doug and I may look like functional old people – and we are –pretty much.
Over the years, mellowing a bit, in fact, we [may] give a good imitation! We learned to compensate for what the other has not been able to give or be. Not because either one of us is a repository of grace or mercy. But, the Lord has been faithful . . . surprising . . . generous . . . loving. So, we trust Him for what’s around the scary bend we know is coming, but we can’t see.
For now, I’ll pass on marriage advice to complement KISS’ advice for dysfunctional people who don’t want to give up on each other.
#1. Consider Christ. #2 Master four simple sentences:
I was wrong.
I don’t know.
I need help. ~ Louise Penny