Context
Persistent problems can improve my prayers. When they make prayer my only option, doubts turn into questions, and fear into faith — wobbly, maybe, but faith.
I remember one of Your lessons in prayer:
As I was filling out new medical forms
with old information,
for a new doctor I am seeing,
I looked across the room and saw
a soul whose skin problems were
oh so worse than mine.
He sat outside the door, so still.
His hands – his feet —
his face and scalp, aflame.
Was it ointments or oozing skin that glistened?
My God!
Indeed – did I just hear You speak?
You’ve heard me plead, cajole and carp,
for how long?
Four years – no five — forever?
No.
Puny persistent problems just seem that way!
You showed me someone else’s trouble, so
I might appreciate better my own, and
see a speck of what
You see.
Keep me quiet Lord –
so my complaints don’t stifle Your voice;
or in my hurt,
I refuse Your help,
and deny Your love.
Take my doubts and shape them
into questions
we can talk about,
and into prayers for others,
who hurt,
without Your help
or hope.
June 4, 2017

My Only Option